It was Finals and I had won every dam round till the top 5 so I figured I was in a good position to Kick Kelsey Thompsons Scrawny Little Butt. The Bet was, I would get a mohawk if toll bag dropped the mustash. The one that hides a knarly scar on his face from his 5th COUNT EM 5th time he smashed up his face. He's not all that pretty to being with so the Mustash was helping him out and well to make a long story short. Kelsey got Lucky. The only time he beat me all comp he did so in finals, wiht the luckiest ride ever. So I am sporting a mohawk these days........
Carly and I are staying with an old friend Michelle Earls who owns a business called Kananaskis Outfitters in, you guessed it in Kananaskis. She rents bikes does bike tours and hiking canoeing kayaking you name it she does it and guides it. So we went in to the shop and she took us out on a bike tour. Michelle was blasting down a hill, dog and myself in hot pursuit when a YAK sized monster bolted from the trail right in front of us. We blew by the beast and stopped on a bridge just about 30 yards away. Massive Grizzly huge hump on its back and a colossal sized face. Carly came trundling down the path moving like a slug with a heart condition. By the time she showed we were yelling our heads off at this bear. He was parked right beside the trail just looking at us, and here comes poky pants McDonald. (I call her McDonald only when she is going to do something UN-Harris like….)
We have all seen that movie when the main character of some animal flick is standing there just chewing its cud. The main character is someone like bambi and right behind it is this raging monster gaining ground teeth and nails nothing but bad intentions. Deer just standing there, munching away some dark drumming noise background. That deer was my wife. We are yelling, “GO Carly GO, keep peddling keep going.” Carly stops, puts her foot down and I Crap myself and have a heart attack all at the same time. I am off my bike at this point doing the funky chicken waving, prancing and flapping like an idiot. Carly says, “What”? 6 feet away and 6 feet up is a massive Grizzly. He’s just cocking his head left and right looking at her. Carly looks and only sees bushes. But gets the point as I gain flapping momentum. Carly will tell you she only stopped for a second. It looked to me like she was stopping for dinner. Needless to say I am still married. But we now own Bear Spray and Carly can’t walk to the car without it. Carly Claims Bears don’t Eat Vegans that’s why it isn’t a problem..
Add one grey hair to the patch I got growing on top.
